Messed up

That's me. I don't have much else to say, because anything I say isn't going to be good. I'm just messed up, and praying for a reprieve soon. Not really sure what I can do to help it. Or at least the options aren't attractive.
One thing I do know though: I don't like the "new" voice of Mr. Whittaker. Why do they keep having to change it?

Busy Week

Lots to do this week getting ready for a sort of family "retreat" at camp this weekend. All my brothers and family, and Mom and Andrea are coming to stay, Friday through Sunday. I'm looking forward to some fun; they're pretty crazy when they all get together. But first there is the packing and cooking of food. We're doing some meals and buying some, so I'm on for tonight with crock pot lasagna. It wouldn't be that big of deal if I didn't have to work these last three days, and if I had stayed home and did stuff instead of going to a friend's house until late. :) But it was worth it; it wasn't so long ago that I didn't have that option. So the work can wait! And that led me to decide to just leave church early today and go home and do stuff; so really it's a double bonus.
We're having another birthday party for Parker there too (did I already say that?) and so I'm getting stuff together for that. And even made and decorated a "Curious George" cake for him. Not sure if I will post a picture of it or not...I'm not terribly proud of it. Why didn't I let Mike decorate it? He's the artist. I was almost in tears at one point, but as Andrea said I "pushed through" and it turned out at least recognizable. Parker had a big grin when he saw it so that is what counts. Although my brothers will probably laugh at it. :P Parker is of course excited and asks me several times a day if he can have birthday cake yet. And he can't wait for Nolen and Gabe to come. At least I'm not the only excited one. :)

A dithering creature

It's been awhile since I posted again. I just don't get online much when I'm at home. Too many other things to be doing. Been rather busy so far this week. Planning a retreat of sorts with my family this weekend at camp so I've been shopping for that and the included b-day party for Parker, had to travel to Clarion for a party with the great-parents, had company for supper Monday night, and then last night also last minute although they brought their own food. In the midst of that trying to keep up exercising and a regular bedtime for Parker. I had all of these clever insights to write this morning right after I drank my coffee, but they have since faded. Oh well, must not have been that insightful.
Oh, I do remember one of the thoughts though: For the most part I don't complain about being female, because well, it's kinda like the weather, what am I going to do about it? But one thing that annoys me is that when I'm in a bad mood and everything seems bad I can't really know. Is it PMS? Am I pregnant? Have I just not had enough caffeine today? Or do I really have an issue? It gets frustrating really. I mean I know "the heart is deceitful above all things. Who can trust it?" So there's that too. It just makes myself rather hard to live with. :P I tend to do better with my moods if I know what the real cause is; then it can be dealt with and I can move on. Otherwise, it might just PMS but not being able to determine that I blame it on my poor husband and create an issue. It's just messy. Along those lines, I read this great stuff from Lewis this morning in my devotional: "Faith...is the art of holding on to things your reason has once accepted, in spite of your changing moods...unless you teach your moods "where to get off," you can never be either a sound Christian or even a sound atheist, but just a creature dithering to and fro, with its beliefs really depending on the weather and the state of its digestion."

Happy Birthday to Parker

#2 is more fun than #1 I think, because Parker is way into his birthday this year. He's been talking about his Curious George "plates, napkins, balloons" and singing "happy to you Parker" for awhile now. He gets really excited and waves his arms whenever there's a new gift to open. This morning at work we had a few of Parker's friends and adopted grandparents come for cupcakes and coffee. That was pretty fun. I just enjoyed watching how many people love him and was glad that he gave them hugs and nicely said "'nanks a coming!" Next weekend we're having a "big" party at camp with cousins and aunts and uncles and grandpa and grandma. And Wesley; Parker specifically requested "Wesley come to party." Hard to refuse that. We're really keeping it pretty simple because it doesn't take much to delight him and mostly he just likes being the center of attention. And eating "birthday cakes." I cheated though and made him banana cupcakes that are actually pretty healthy and then doused them in cream cheese frosting; so I don't mind if he eats a few in a day. :) Here's some pictures of the birthday boy:

I just had this conversation with Parker after he brought me a toy raccoon that he found that another little boy had forgotten (keep in mind that he's not yet even 2):
"Mama, 'dis, pitty."
"Oh, is that Jack's raccoon?"
"Pitty hand."
"Yeah, I think Jack must have left that here."
"I don't think so, mama. Parker hold it."
"You want to play with it? You can play with it now, but we need to take it to Jack later."
" I don't think so."
"Yes, we need to take it back to Jack, or he will be sad."
"No sad, Jack."
"Right, so we need to take him back his toy."
"I don't think so. Parker take it."
"No, you play with it now and we'll take it back to Jack later."
"I don't think so, Mama. "

I don't know where that "I don't think so" came from, but he says it all the time now. He amazes me with his ability to express what he's really thinking. And he's already exhibiting selfishness. :P